Miserable at best

"And everything I could give
Is everything you couldn't take
Cause nothing feels like home, you're a thousand miles away
And the hardest part of living
Is just taking breaths to stay"

Sometimes life is bullshit. Theres no point to live if you have nothing left.
I know i gotta trust God and let him take the lead. That doesnt make it
any easier for me to put a smile on my face. I always distance myself
from everything that could hurt me after ive been hurt more than
I can count on my ten fingers and toes. My worst enemy has always
been and always will be my own damn self. I struggle to understand
what i could possible give to God if everything i have is tooken away.
Then i realize i can give him my whole heart and nothing else because
its not attached to other people, or music, or drugs, or alcohol, or myself.
My heart was in need of someone to repair it and that is exactly what God does
and its exactly what God wants from me.